22:47 My mind has just exploded in technicolour. Joseph is riding a chameleon shaped skateboard kick flipping over my synapses. Singing, Audioslave at the top of my beautiful voice. SHOOOWWW MEEE HOWWW TOO LIVEEEE
20:24 Struggling. I’ve had a pretty good day up until a couple of hours ago when I noticed my mood changing. I was becoming snappy, moody, angry. Like a dark cloud was descending upon me and I engaged it in combat. I tried fighting but it won, as always. Now I sit on my own, in the dark with only the light of this computer screen. My limbs feel heavy, emotion has been sapped from me and I just feel numb. Hollow.
There has been no trigger, I just always seem to go to this dark place after being on top of the world.
On my way down I detach. Everything has lost all meaning, nothing is good or bad. Nothing exists.
Listening to Linkin Park & Chris Cornell. When I kill myself I’ll hang.